Deafness VS Hearing

Hello everyone,

Now I know it has been a while since I last posted, but I have bottled up something and I going to discuss it with you right now.

As you may, or may not, know I have High-Bilateral Senseorial Hearing Loss. This means that both of my ears have the same loss of frequency (a type of noise).

Frequency means different things to different people. However, to people who are in the deaf community the word 'frequency' mean a level of volume. To explain this further we use decibels to measure sound. Each decibel has its own bracket of volume and the volume determines whether the sound is a High pitch or a Low pitch.

In this case "pitch" is the same as" frequency".

So my loss of hearing is of a higher frequency. This means without my hearing aids (a mold connected to a machine that helps me to hear) I cannot hear that level/pitch/frequency of noise.

To give you a perspective on how much I cannot hear here are a few examples:

- Birds chirping

- People coming up behind me

- Crickets

- Cicadas

- Whistles

- Different car horns

- People (in different situations)

- Certain Music (Orchestra or Opera)

- Machines that beep (counter monitors)

- Cars (of a certain make)

In short terms I cannot hear a lot...

Now over the past year, I have started to lose some of my 'lower frequency' range as well. This bracket applies to anything that I have not previously covered such as:

- People (where ever they may be)

- Cars (although I do struggle with this one)

- Music (of any kind)

- Construction

- Simple things such as a timer or a light switch

- Planes

- Basically anything

Although the list is a lot longer than this (thanks to brain fog and chemo brain!) I thought I would talk about why it is important to understand these small difference if you can hear.

If you can hear, no doubt you will take anything and everything for-granted. You hear on a level in which we cannot. It will not bother you if your child laughs, because you can hear them.

Deaf people only dream of hearing without aids.

We wish to hear simple things without relying on a robot, an interpretation or a machine to help us. Our hearing will not get better for us. It is not as if some doctor can prescribe us a medication to make it better, although they could get some interpreters in....

My life is hard enough be able to 'just about' hear. I can hear a lot, with my aids in. However, when I take both out it is isolating and fear inducing, because I cannot hear. Even with them in i struggle to go out now because I cannot hear my mum talking to me, or a car driving up to me.

If I am to cross a road, my life is in danger if a reckless driver comes near me. Even if I look both ways...

Just because people like me 'can' hear, does not mean we can hear well. I do not think we do it for the attention either. To be honest, we do not get any!

The amount of people who have accused me of not wearing me hearing aids, or not listening to them or say 'why are you staring at me?!' is infuriating.

First of all, I have to wear my aids whether I like it or not. They basically keep me alive. Even if I forget I soon realize something is not right.

Second, I choose to listen to you. That is my one pleasure of being with people. I can tune in and out whenever I like. It becomes fun when you do not like someone...

Lastly, I am staring at you because I am trying to concentrate on your beautiful lip-pattern.

Another technique us Deaf gals and pals have used is 'lip-reading'. To put it plainly we stare at you pretty lips to understand you. Whether you know or not everyone has a lip-pattern. When you talk your lips move along to those words creating a pattern. Pretty cool for someone who cannot hear. It helps us to respond to you or to listen, without physically listening.

However, this method makes us exhausted. Whilst we search for your lip-pattern you could turn your back or not articulate your mouth enough and we could get lost. I miss full sentences all of the time because of these simple yet problematic situations.

It does not get easier, believe me.

I have grown up in a world where I cannot hear, yet others can. It frightens me at the prospect of losing all of my hearing. However, there are ways I am coping.

First of all, I am getting to grips with British Sign Language. So there will be a lot of people who will argue that SSE and BSL or BSL and ASL are all the 'same'. To put it plainly they are not the same.

British sign Language will shorten sentences and place different words in front of other to quicken communication. When in use it is very effective for people like me who are always tired.

SSE is Sign Supported English. Now this is totally different to BSL. SSE will construct full sentences to make communication easier. BSL is known for being harder so some Deaf people sign this way.

ASL is American Sign Language. As far as I am aware ASL is not used in Britain, because we are not American. As well as that, ASL teaches people to use on hand to sign instead of two. Both of the other languages use two hands instead of one.

I am trying to learn BSL as it gives me access to communicate with people I know (I have Deaf friends) easily rather than struggling to communicate. I am learning in my own time, meaning I can balance work and studying easily. Plus, if I go profoundly deaf it means I can have easy communication with interpreters (signers who are paid by establishments to communicate with deaf people to help them become independent).

In the past few years, I have met a few interpreters who have shown me basic BSL and they were all so kind. Interpreters are generally with Deaf people in schools, hospitals or out and about.

Another trick I am learning is to extend my vocabulary whilst I can. Believe me when I say this when I get to a point where I can no longer hear, I will still be able to talk. So making sure my English skills are up to date helps with any mishaps in the future.

My favorite access skill is captioning. Whether I am watching TV or going to the cinema I always want the subtitles/captions on. However, cinemas and TV companies say that they cannot give this to everyone as no one is asking for it.

I'm sorry there are hundreds of thousands of deaf/hearing impaired people in Britain who do not understand what people are saying. If you can make toilets wheelchair accessible, or give people braille or even provide people with guide dogs surely it is not hard to subtitle your damn film!

If you go to the cinema and watch a foreign film, are you going to watch it without subtitles, even if you can hear? No because the film company has provided the captions for you before you thought about learning a new language..

I know I am not the only angry person who cannot go to the cinema when she wants, because of so called 'pre-planning'. However, it is human right that I should have something provided to help me gain access to my beautiful world.

Unfortunately, corporations only see one complaint from someone saying "Ugh I was annoyed that I saw a screening that was captioned, even though there was a Deaf club there. I want a refund, because I didn't ask or pay for this!", and they think those people have more experience and human rights than the Deaf Community.

With relentless campaigning people have failed because companies will not let us have access to one thing. If I go to watch a show on catch-up I have to make sure it is from the BBC or I have recorded it, otherwise there will be no subtitles for me. Meaning it is harder for me to watch something that I am genuinely interested in.

If people at Stonewall or the Suffragettes did not do their protests or rallies, do you think they would have got what they asked for? Believe me we are fighting very hard back here due to this issue, but no one will listen because we are a 'minority' or people.

Apparently we are to be seen and not heard.

A bit ironic and poetic if you ask me..

I believe more needs to be done in the Hearing World before Deaf People can actually be heard. It is a battle I know me and others have been fighting for such a long time, but we will get there.

To anyone who needs advice on helping Deaf people here you go:

- Use common sense (Do not be an idiot and over extenuate your lip-pattern we are not stupid)

- Tap us on the shoulder before you say hello, or come up behind us

- Face us when you are talking to us

- Make sure we understand what you have said (Big note for Teachers here)

- Use our equipment!!! (Radio Aids, Mics anything we give you bloody use it!)

- Give us access, you would not shoo away a dog with a broken leg would you?

- Be kind

- When making jokes do not be a jerk!

- Do not try to jump-scare us or come up behind us without warning. We will punch you or faint.

- If you sign, that is great!

- Ask if we can hear you if not write down what you want to say.

Here is advice for my Deaf/Hearing Impaired Gals, Pals and non-gender conforming friends:

- You can ignore people you do not want to talk to. Just tell them to stop talking. Or not...

- Make sure to tell people if you are deaf/hearing impaired

- Make some Deaf/Hearing Impaired pals!

- Wear your Hearing Aids or Cochlea Implants!!

- Use your equipment, even when there are bigots around...

- Flaunt of your disability like healthy people flaunt their health! Might as well!

- Read some books, it helps to escape our awfully health conforming world

- Raise awareness of your loss of hearing (only if you want to)

Over the past few months, I have balanced my college life with home and it is exhausting.

No one at college has had any Deaf awareness, even tutors, and it shows. The first time I gave a tutor my Mini Mic she said "I am loud so you will probably not need it.". To which I told her she will wear it whether she is loud or not.

My plan is to advocate for people who do not have a voice as it is vital that we get the support we need. With Deaf Awareness talks and Student Council meetings planned, I need the message to be received that the world Deaf people live in is worse than Hearing People imagine. We do not want to be Deaf. It is not a fashion accessory.

If you can please share this post. To get our voices heard would be an amazing thing. Then maybe our needs could be taken into consideration.

Molly-Tastic Treves